I’ve been having a hard time being a WAHM (Work-at-Home Mom) lately. If you’re new here, I work from home as a freelancer being a virtual assistant, web designer and basically anything and everything that I am able to do. It’s something I’m proud I get to do while I mother my boys and maintain this mommy blog. Oh, let’s not forget we’re building up our YouTube family vlog channel along side it all. These are the things that I do and I’m happy that I do. But ever since our yaya for Joaquin (my youngest) left, I’ve taken on the job of being a full-time stay-at-home-mom. I try to singit (squeeze in) some online work like transcribing, web designing, blogging and editing vlogs whenever I can, but it’s been hard. Since I’ve been caring for the #SantiagoBros 24/7, our relationship has gotten so close that, well, I almost really have no time to myself. Okay, that’s not entirely true. I still get to bathe, do groceries alone (that’s at least 1.5 of “me time”!), and I get to attend my Victory Group meeting every Friday (this is non-negotiable!). But because I don’t have that much down time aside from their nap times (2 for Wacky, 1 for Jacob with Wacky), I’ve lost that window to do actual work. I try to do them at night when all of them are asleep, but sometimes I am just too tired after a day with them. Though I make sure I turn over whatever work is due, even if it means pulling an all nighter (not pretty when you have to wake up at 7AM).
What have I been doing as a SAHM?
Don’t get me wrong, I love being a full-time SAHM. And I love that my boys are closer to me than ever! Jacob and I get to talk more and actually do our homeschool routine. It’s so fulfilling when he really learns something from me. FROM ME! I am just so proud of us because we’re actually homeschooling and learning amidst the doubters and naysayers. And Joaquin, our relationship is so much more deeper. We’re in tune. Back when he had a yaya, I’d only watch him while he naps or whenever I can since I do my work and whatever I want.
I just wished that I had time to work so I can bring in extra cash for the family. That extra money, no matter how small, allows us to bring the kids out, get treats, go on a vacation/staycation or simply add to our weekly budget and pay the bills. And…
*Joaquin goes beside my table and pulls my arm to lift him up so he can sit on my lap…* #THESTRUGGLEISVERYREAL
Okay, I’ve placed him on a chair next to me so I can finish this post.
I’m content with being a SAHM and serving my husband and kids 24/7. This is something I dreamed about doing when Oscar and I were still dating. I find great joy in mothering and wife-ing (LOL). But there’s something about being able to pitch in with the expenses and accomplishing something on the side that just puts the cherry on top. You get what I’m saying? So while I’m not able to do much work, I try to pour my remaining time for work on the blog and on our YouTube channel. But you know what? I don’t see what I’m doing as work really. What I do, I’m passionate about them. I love staying up all night editing. I love sitting down and writing my thoughts and sharing it with you guys. Just like what the saying goes, “Do something you love, and you’ll never have to work a single day in your life.”
You might be wondering, why am I struggling? Isn’t that what a WAHM is supposed to do? Balance work and life at home? Well, yes. I suppose that is the idea behind being a WAHM. I struggle because my youngest needs constant watching because of his eczema. One minute, he could be playing, the next, he’d be digging into his skin. Oscar and I would talk about how hard it is sometimes, especially when we’re dealing with a flare up or an allergic reaction. We sometimes think it would be easier to parent three kids without eczema, than two with one eczema baby. As much as we would wish and pray that Wacky didn’t have eczema at all, I really believe that God gave us these challenges for a reason. Everything has a reason with Him. I used to question His plan and ask why he gave Wacky this kind of life. But I’ve stopped asking and started praying more. Praying that despite his skin condition and his struggles, He will be by us, helping us get through it all and providing us with patience and strength.
We STILL haven’t talked about our eczema story. Jeez. We really need to get to it. Either here or on the vlog. But when do Oscar and I get quiet time to actually film? Umm, never? Because we need to be in the same room (we co-sleep) with Wacky in case he wakes up at night and scratches like there’s no tomorrow.question His plan and ask why he gave Wacky this kind of life.
*Joaquin whines and asks to be carried…*
*AFTER 5 MINUTES AND PUTTING ON LITTLE BABY BUM ON TV*
Okay, where was I? AH. So yeah, we’re not able to work on the vlog and have a sit-down episode for it because we simply do not have time to do it. He’s tired from his 8-5 job and jiu jitsu training that I’m afraid if we try to film past midnight (after Joaquin’s first night wake-up), he’d be too tired to talk and nothing coherent will come out of our mouths. We’ll need somebody to watch the kids for us so we’ll be able to do this. Calling the #SantiagoBros’ godparents!
Anyway, the struggle is there. I’m trying not to think about it too much and just be appreciative that I am able to watch my kids grow and that I am hands-on with them. But earlier as I was trying to put Wacky to sleep for his afternoon nap, which didn’t happen by the way, we were just laying down on the bed for TWO FREAKIN’ HOURS. He just wouldn’t sleep, but he was just chilling there and want me next to him. I had some transcribing to do which I was already struggling with, and I couldn’t do it while they’re awake. After laying down with him, I felt that he was warmer than usual. Got the ear thermometer out, and I was right, he’s starting a fever. That explains why he’s extra clingy and want me next to him 24/7. So for now, after I publish this, I’ll focus on helping him get better and turn off the TV (my helping hand to be able to blog/edit/work) and be with them. Because that’s my first “job”.